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Posts Tagged ‘life’

When life happens, just get over it!

As Black women in America, we are often told that “we have to do what we have to do.” But what if you have just experienced the loss of a loved one, divorce, rape, abuse, or harassment on the job?  After recently dealing with the loss of my great-uncle, who was also my God Father and the man who gave me away at my wedding, I observed how people reacted to my hurt and inability to function as I normally do on a daily basis.  Comments such as, “he was ‘just’ your uncle and you are depressed like this,” or “oh, well did you finish….!” It was as if my suffering did not matter. The only thing that mattered was what I needed to do for others.  I then realized that I was supposed to “just get over it!”

life happensWe live in a country where the black woman is “the mule of the world” and everyone simply rides her back for their convenience and benefit without even asking if she needs water.  Everyone expects her to plow and “keep on pushing,” even though she is in pain and suffering from the daily dilemmas of life.

Being a black woman in education, as many black women are, I think it is important for others to consider the daily experiences and responsibilities we endure and how they impact our overall health. Instead of patronizing us when we do not “perform” at our normal par, people should “offer a glass of water.” This water will give us a chance to cleanse the incredible pain and sorrow that many of us hold deeply inside. Remember that we sacrifice ourselves for the sake of others daily, as well as their children, while we develop some form of illness, such as diabetes, depression and hypertension, which are all prevalent among black women and impact us psychologically.

Upon reflecting on my experiences by witnessing many other black women going through the same struggle, I recognized the commonality in their outward expression of strength and could not help but wonder what lies within us to “keep pushin.”

Growing up, my great-grandmother was always well groomed and beautiful, and the beauty she had on the outside was unmatched by the beauty and strength that she carried on the inside.   She cared deeply for the well-being of everyone around her, especially her family. She managed to care for everyone and everything while rarely voicing her own needs. As her health declined, however, the consequences of her silence and self-sacrifice became more evident until her passing.

Now as an adult with a family of my own, I find myself challenged by managing a stressful work environment and a multitude of personal responsibilities, along with navigating institutional spaces that require me to code-switch in ways that both “protect” and silence me.  I have found solace in my historical roots, which is the strength of many ancestors, and resilience serves as a primary coping strategy, but no more will this be—not for me, and no longer for you all!

We must realize that we must overcome and overlook what people think of us, and take care of ourselves.  We will not succumb to our own “self-sacrifice” for the sake of others. We must ask: is it necessary that we sacrifice ourselves in order to be successful in our work and home life? The answer is no. So the next time you find yourself “down, out, and thirsty for a ‘glass of water’,” remember that you are beautiful, that you matter, and that YOU must take care of yourself FIRST AND FOREMOST and allow people to “just get over THAT!”

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This day in black history: honoring the life and legacy of Dr. Carter G. Woodson


Photo: Wikicommons

On today, December 19, 2013, Atlanta Free Speech celebrates the birth and life of Dr. Carter G. Woodson.  Woodson’s most famous work, The Mis-Education of the Negro, is a work that is still relevant today and calls for us to continue to question the state of blacks in America in relation to race, sex, class, and gender issues that are prevalent among the race.  He is also the founder of the Association for the Study of African American Life and History and a founding member of the Journal of Negro History. Woodson also pushed for legislation to acknowledge February as Black History Month, thus, making him the “Father of Black History.”  When remembering Dr. Woodson, let us think about the meaning of his infamous words…

“When you control a man’s thinking you do not have to worry about his actions.  You do  not have to tell him not to stand here, or go yonder.  He will find his “proper place” and will stay in it.  You do not need to send him to the back door.  He will go without being told.  In fact, if there is no back door, he will cut one for his special benefit.  His education makes it necessary.”- Dr. Carter G. Woodson

If you would like to learn more about this pioneer of Black Studies and Black History, works by Woodson, and on him are below.

  • The Education of the Negro Prior to 1861 (1915)
  • A Century of Negro Migration (1918)
  • The History of the Negro Church (1921)
  • The Negro in Our History (1922)
  • Free Negro Owners of Slaves in the United States in 1830, Together With Absentee Ownership of Slaves in the United States in 1830 (1924)
  • Free Negro Heads of Families in the United States in 1830, Together With a Brief Treatment of the Free Negro (1925)
  • Negro Orators and Their Orations (1925)
  • The Mind of the Negro as Reflected in Letters Written During the Crisis, 1800–1860 (1927)
  • Negro Makers of History (1928)
  • African Myths, Together With Proverbs (1928)
  • The Rural Negro (1930)
  • The Negro Wage Earner (1930)
  • The Mis-Education of the Negro (1933)
  • The Negro Professional Man and the Community, With Special Emphasis on the Physician and the Lawyer (1934)
  • The Story of the Negro Retold (1935)
  • The African Background Outlined: Or, Handbook for the Study of the Negro (1936)
  • African Heroes and Heroines (1939)
  • The Works of Francis J. Grimké (1942)
  • Carter G. Woodson’s Appeal: The Lost Manuscript Edition (2008)


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Deadmau5 mix with Visualizations (Rubiq, Outta my Life, RoflCopter, Sex Slave, Sketchy, Vanishing)

TRACKLIST: Intro = deadmau5 – Rubiq 1:35 = deadmau5 – Outta My Life (DeepDubMix) 3:30 = deadmau5 – Sex Slave 4:45 = BSOD – Roflcopter 6:22 = BSOD – A Bit Ske… ___________________________ Read More….

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Life Technologies’ GlobalFiler Express Kit approved for use in National DNA Index System

Top Priority Sector:  law_enforcement_first_responders Image Caption:  Read More….

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You Get In Life What You Tolerate – This is a powerful passage from Darren Hardy’s book, The Compound Effect, about getting in l…

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Breathing Life into Freedom of Information Laws

The Challenges of Implementation in the Democratizing World.

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Sex Slave Changes Activist’s Life – Kevin Bales

Complete video at: Kevin Bales, author of the Slave Next Door, recalls a… ___________________________ Read More….

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Rick Ross ft. Diddy, Meek Mill & French Montana – “Bout That Life” [LISTEN]

Maybach Music Group look to cement their place in the ranks of notable September releases with their upcoming Self Made, Vol. 3 compilation album. With that in mind, they liberate a new track called “Bout That Life,” featuring Rick Ross, Diddy, Meek Mill, and French Montana. Apparently, fraudulence is at an all time high in Hip-Hop and […]

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Second Life The Hidden Trouble of Child Prostitution

Second Life – your best source for free MMOs, free MMORPGs and free to play online games information! ___________________________ Read More….

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2Pac Feat Kool G , Nas – Fast Life Temptations – Remix FAT B 2013

2Pac Feat Kool G , Nas – Fast Life Temptations – Remix FAT B 2013. Read More….

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